I feel alive
Rosanna Machado | May 31, 2021
In the last few years, I have got more in tune with all my emotions, whether those are negative or positive and sought to understand what’s going on for me. Susan David describes emotional agility as ‘the ability to be with your emotions with curiosity, compassion and especially the courage to take values-connected steps’. In 2020, this has been a particularly rewarding process for me and made easier by the slower pace of life due to the pandemic and less work.
I’m currently in a very busy phase of work and found myself this week full of frustration and beating myself up because I felt I had neglected one of my goals for the month. It was only when I stopped and reflected that I realised that I had achieved far more than I had given myself credit for. I am sure I’m not the only one to lose compassion for myself in the heat of the moment. The lesson for me was to continue experiencing those emotions but to explore fully what they mean and, importantly, to do it without judgement. So the next time you are feeling a strong emotion, take the time to really step into it:
- Sit with all your emotions. Sometimes stepping outside and observing them will help to give you perspective
- Take time to reflect on what’s really going – often the core emotion we display might be masking something deeper within
- Find a way to process them in a way that works for you – think about macro and micro coping strategies
- Remind yourself of your purpose and goals and think about whether the emotions are moving you in the right direction
- Hold on to your set of values as a way of guiding your behaviour
- Celebrate the wins – we are wired to focus on the negative more than the positive, so it is important to celebrate the good stuff too
- Practice gratitude
- Be kind to yourself
To live life fully means we will experience discomfort, there will be highs and lows and that’s ok. It takes courage and resilience, and you have to open yourself up which can feel scary but when you embrace it all, it can be amazing. My coaching sessions are all about raising self-awareness within my coachee and it’s something that I strive to practice within myself too and when you get there, it will be worth it. As Phil Joyce says, “you feel fully alive, exquisitely aware of being in the moment with a sense of connection, spontaneity and freedom”.